I got a brand new car
I got a jazz guitar

Welcome, everybody

Thank you a lot for coming, it means a lot to me
Steer the yacht with my knee, plenty of botany
Damn, bad chick on top of me, pornography
And I know she only want me for my guap-ery
(Ahem... let me get my voice right
Gary, sorry, 1, 2, 3, 4)
It's the first time ever
Yo f**k this jacket, I turn this shit to 85 napkins
Since Jeter's done I'm now the captain
Trust you me, Gotham's safer now
But there's always a new joker in town
Ready to smoke you with that pound
But when he shoots it, the flag says "BANG!" and everybody laughs
He must be up and off the molly tab
I'm by the bar lookin' Swedish in the trenchcoat stupid
The only one drinkin' mango lassi in the bullpen
My lips are sealed like the singer with bad skin
My need for speed made the Jag spin
Dog, I'll resurrect Freaky Tah to do my ad-libs
Overseas I prolly got mad kids
That I don't even know about, you better slow down, baby
I'm still young, f**k it, gotta use it while it works
Nothin' lasts forever, or does it? Fuck it
Shout out to my cousins, all of 'em

I got a brand new car
I got a jazz guitar

I'll take it back to playin' handball and smokin' on the park benches
Dippin' cabs and hoppin' fences
Laughin' all the way back to the buildin' runnin'
Got to the door, twist the key, elevator waitin' for me
100, got upstairs and fixed eleven bowls of Crispix
Grabbed a Snapple out the bin, no one's an even match for the kid
Legs are made of stone, the back of a bridge
In goal line situations I'll tackle The Fridge
Peace to Mike Ditka, 50 on the light fixture
Right side shifter, fight fixer, twist your sister
And I ain't talkin' 'bout the hair band, mothaf**ka
It's Bam Bam doin' ah ah ah ah

Out with the, ah!
I can't even get this f**kin' right, are you kidding me?
I'm ashamed of myself, I'm sorry